The “having it all” idea is a challenge. One thing that I think Sheryl Sandberg got right in Lean In was the point that it takes the right partner to make having a career and raising kids work – for both partners.
Now, if we can embrace feminism and make it equally OK for either partner to take the lead in child-rearing, that would be great. I just re-read the scene in Voyager where Frank decides to take Brianna to his office after school, so Claire can continue her Med studies. He does it not to support Claire so much as because it’s the right thing for Brianna, but still acknowledges that it’s clearly Claire’s purpose to be a doctor, and having that clarity of purpose is something he envies her.
I’m not personally dealing with choices about kids, but there are some things I really want to do, but don’t have a partner to carry part of the load for me to do them. As someone else mentioned, the idea of having a strong partner like Jamie makes me really want to be Claire right about now (as long as he’s not off getting shot at by Redcoats.)